Profanity

Ephesians 4:29; 5:15-20

I frequently and openly admit that I don’t consider myself a “good” pastor in the conventional sense of the word. In response to me saying that, many people reassure me otherwise and that is, of course, nice. It’s not like I believe I shouldn’t be where I am these days as the pastor of this wonderful church, and I don’t think I am neglecting to do what God is calling me to do in my life as a Christian. As we like to say in Methodism, I am on a journey to “perfection in love.” But I don’t necessarily think it’s “bad” at times to not fit the mold of a “good pastor,” either

And I have often felt this way about being a Christian, too. But while I am saying that, I am also seeing just how absurd things are with American Christianity these days. So maybe there just isn’t a single “mold” to fit into when it comes to being Christian anymore.

I think there is a vast diversity of ways we can be faithful to our calling and our relationship with Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. There is a wide assortment of people types who find themselves confessing that Jesus Christ is Lord. It’s beautiful.

And yet, one thing that gets me in trouble a lot, both as a Christian and definitely as a pastor, is that I use profanity. Despite growing up in a church that very strongly taught against such a practice, I picked up a free-flowing “impolite” vocabulary in High School—especially on construction sites when I worked for an electric company during the summer.

I wasn’t kidding about my childhood church’s strong stance on profanity. I still remember how horrified I felt in youth group as a teenager when we were playing the game “Catchphrase” and holding the word generator when the buzzer went off. Without thinking I cried out, “Da@#(%&!” The whole room went silent, and in response to the magnitude of the mistake I just made, without thinking I responded to the moment with, “Oh S@#$!”

I am in my thirties now, and I think that story is hilarious. But I have a different relationship with profanity now than I did back then.

Of course, this still leads me to believe how little I fit into the Christian “mold” of “pastor.” As a person, and as a pastor, I use profanity. I don’t claim that I always am on the right side of morality every time I do it, but I also want to challenge the conventional ideas we have around profanity, too.

Isn’t it interesting how we have chosen certain words in the English language to be considered “profane?” And what do we mean by that, exactly? Does profane equal bad?

When the author of Ephesians wrote, “Let no evil (the NIV uses the word “unwholesome” and I like that more) talk come out of your mouths but only what is good for building up,” (Ephesians 4:29 NRSVUE) was that specifically about word choices? Surely it isn’t that simplistic!

I have used profanity in ways that were unwholesome while wearing my clergy collar. I regret the times I have done that. By the way, that is one reason your pastor wears a collar—it helps me remember what and who I am representing in public. But I have also used profanity while wearing my collar with no regrets at all. Me saying cuss words in my conversation with a neighbor who witnesses me wearing my collar breaks down a barrier and reduces the human distance between me and them.

And let’s admit it, all of us have cussed in response to pain. I jokingly tell people that profanity is one of my tools for pain relief—especially these days when I am getting progressively clumsier!

But there is something to the simple commandment to “let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouths” that I think is important for us to remember, and it is what the author in Ephesians says later in chapter 5: “The days are evil.”

I see the evil of these days in the speech coming out of people’s mouths that does not have a single syllable of profanity in them. I see the evil of these days in the polite dehumanization of homeless people. I see it in the racist euphemisms are work in our politics. I see unwholesome talk in our gossip and the way we find it so easy to make fun of people whose worst moments end up on our television screens because everything is recorded.

Ingrid Andress’ moment of recognition that she needed help dealing with alcoholism was unavoidably public because it resulted in an unbearable rendition of the national anthem. How many people saw that and laughed before it occurred to them to wonder if she was ok?

There are countless examples of unwholesome talk we could point out that don’t have the “forbidden” words we consider profanity. And so, I think we can think more deeply about what really constitutes unwholesome talk these days than whether or not a certain word is uttered.

And I think all of us could benefit more from speech that builds up, that is “filled with the Holy Spirit” and “giving thanks...for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,” even if in that gratitude and building up a four letter word might slip out!